Well, there’s folks that talk to their horse like it’s the lead actress in a soap opera, callin’ it “ma’am” and “darlin’,” brushin’ its mane with a $60 comb while wearin’ a shirt that ain’t seen soap since Clinton was in office. Meanwhile, that horse is sittin’ there like, “I only eat alfalfa spritzed with spring water and I don’t trot for less than applause.” Ain’t nothin’ wrong with lovin’ your horse, but when ol’ Buttercup’s got a personal astrologer and a custom made saddle that costs more t